Angry Swans and Other Oddities...

I had no idea swans were so protected in England. 

Odd way to start a blog, I know.

I found this out directly after googling and reading countless articles on angry swans.  Apparently some swans do have anger management problems.  Swan to human encounters can be pretty dangerous.  Because they attack relentlessly on the water if they are threatened or feel their territory is threatened, they have actually been deemed the cause of quite a number of cases of drowning.  One swan, in particular, had to be moved to a new location because it capsized canoes and kayaks with its 7-foot wingspan.

I knew none of this before my encounter this evening with THE ANGRY SWAN.  In a way I am glad.  Sometimes reading sensationalized material can make things way more scarey than they really are.  So I went into the encounter with no prejudice.

I'm a bird lover from way back.  I had a parakeet when I was very young.  I don't remember its name.  It said one word.  I don't remember the word it said.  It also whistled.  I do remember what that sounded like. 

After the parakeet I graduated to a rooster that belonged to my grandparents.  They had a lot of chickens.  The rooster was a Rhode Island Red (I was older so I remember more).  It had an innocuous name like Roo or Buddy.  But it wasn't harmless.  It was kind of angry.  All the time.  Because my grandparents owned these birds as a food source, one day the rooster was gone.  I think he was the protein source for a batch of chicken soup.  I was angry.  But then again, I thought about it and decided that the fate of angry things in my family wasn't a good one.

It's funny how history repeats itself, because we are the owners of a Rhode Island Red rooster named Eugene.  He is never angry.  He loves us, and turns his head sideways as if he is listening every time we say his name.  He has learned we are a food source and we are good providers.

I marvel at gray herons, I watch for egrets, I see the red-tailed hawks buzz our property, I see owls fly in front of my car up the long drive access road at night, and (no, I am not making this up) I even had an encounter with what seemed to be a TAMED grouse that used to wait for me by the mailbox.  I love birds.

So for many weeks I've been thinking about driving over to a local farm and taking some photos of the swans that float lazily on their pond.  This farm has a small roadside stand that sells produce.  I stop there a lot, but never seem to have my camera.  I needed some ingredients for a stir fry and decided to hop over to the farm to grab the goods, finally remembering that I wanted to take this photo of the swans, and throwing my camera into the car.

Some of the flowers growing near the farm stand.

I've gone to this farm a lot.  It's an honor system farm.  You pick what you want, leave your money in the box.  Everyone is very good about it.  You can also cut fresh flowers, or lettuce, or rhubarb, or herbs.  The pond is just down from the stand, near a great barn, so after buying what I needed and putting it in my car, I headed down with my camera toward the water.

I have never noticed the sign on the fence gate that reads "Do Not Enter. Stay Out. Angry Swan."  Luckily, you don't have to enter to get to the water.  I do believe in signs that might warn of impending doom.  I figure people put them there for a reason.  Knowledge is power.

So I walked along the outside of the fence noticing that the lovely white swans were NOT in the water, but on land tonight.  Not daunted by this, I decided that the photos of the swans on land would still be photos of the swans (the key ingredient), so all was not lost.  To get a good photo of them, however, I would have to get close enough to the fence, placing my camera right against it, in order to not have the fence appear in my picture.

I must have looked suspicious from the get go.  I mean, first - I'm an unknown human entity.  Second - I am carrying a large black object that makes a beeping noise when I turn it on.  Third - I am clueless about angry swans.

The largest swan, now has a bead on me and has puffed himself up to twice his size and is making some guttural noise that almost sounds like huffing.  But, he is not hissing (which I have read is something angry swans do as a warning). 

I do remember being chased once by a very angry, hissing goose.  At the time I was faster than the goose, but I'm older now and I don't think I would be faster than a swan.  I'm thinking that the swan can probably fly over the fence if it wanted to.

This sunflower was a great diversion and took my focus off the swan.

Do you not look an angry swan in the eye when it is getting angry?  I have no skills here.  So, I did what seemed reasonable and what my cat, Harry, would do.  I pretended not to be interested at all in the swan.  I stood within five feet of him with a fence between us and turned my camera on the flowers that were growing so lovely to my left.  Focus, lens motor whir, beep, press, snap.  Focus, lens motor whir, beep, press, snap.  I became really interested in the flowers.  I knelt down to get a better angle on flowers low to the ground.  Focus, lens motor whir, beep, press, snap.  Then I remembered the swan and looked over.  He wasn't so fluffy anymore, and he was looking at me sideways, somewhat like Eugene does when I say his name.  He was entranced by the sounds of my camera.  And my camera isn't that loud.  So swans must have some really good hearing abilities.

I also noticed at the start of the swan-fluffing, that a number of ducks came down to the water's edge and were hiding under the overhanging brush.  I think they had come to see what happens to the likes of a human who might not be able to read a warning sign and take heed.  My guess is they make duck bets.



You can see the orange feet of the ducks hiding behind that bush.  They are
trying to act nonchalant, but they are sure I'm going to get creamed by the

   angry swan.

So I stood up again and walked the remaining way down the fence line closer to the water, where I snapped some photos of the lanky cygnets floating around.  They are teenager types.  Pretty soon, unfluffed swan has followed me down and is standing there starting to fluff again.  He is winding his neck back into a tight loop.  I've watched videos on this since my encounter and realize the neck scrunch is in preparation for a possible striking out.  Like a coiled snake.

Some crazy stuff runs through my mind on a daily basis, but I have no idea why the song Red River Valley suddenly popped into my head.  I started to hum it.  Loudly.  Almost fluffed-up-again swan has probably never had an encounter like this himself.  Humming, whirring, beeping, snapping woman was just too much for his senses.  He stood down.  You could see all his feathers retract, neck loosen up.  Music does indeed soothe the savage beast....and, apparently, the angry swan.  I walked back up the bank, still on my side of the fence, and right up to the little crest near the fence to snap photos of the other white swans relaxing there.  He didn't follow me this time.  Just cleaned his wings with his beak.  After that he pretty much ignored me.  Mission accomplished.  Swan photos captured.

I did not, in fact, take any photos of the swan while he was angry.  First, the fence was in the way.  If I could have gotten close enough to put my lens against the fence, I'm sure I would have payed the price of an even angrier swan.

I have no doubt he is an angry bird and very territorial.  Swans may be beautiful, but don't let that suck you into a feeling of security.  Be smart, obey all warning signs, and when in doubt hum Red River Valley.

Aaaarrrrrroooooo!!!

 (For the resulting photos of the swans, visit i got the shot on Facebook, or check out the website http://www.igottheshotphotography.com)