Thursday, June 23, 2011

Please Help Solve This Mystery

I'd like to get deadly serious for a moment.  I've been following a case that involves a starved-to-near-death pit bull named Patrick.  If you are on Facebook and an animal advocate, chances are you've seen and heard all about this particular case.  If not, I'm going to try to sum up in as few paragraphs as possible the background notes for you.

In one corner, we have the Associated Humane Societies and Popcorn Park Zoo (hereafter known as AHS).  In the other we have the Garden State Veterinary Specialists (GSVS).  In the middle, we have Patrick, a dog that was neglected and eventually thrown in the garbage in a plastic bag by his owner.

I cannot post photos of Patrick in this blog because everyone involved seems to "own" them and there is all kinds of verbage about how they must not be posted anywhere.  But you can see photos of him, if you have the stomach to view them, upon arriving at AHS by following this link.  I'm going to warn you, the photos are GRAPHIC.  I also want you to know that I have seen his updated photos and he looks nothing like this anymore.  He is a viable, healthy little pup who seems well adjusted despite his nightmarish experience.  Isn't that just like a dog?

The two groups have gone to court over custody of this little guy.  While AHS first brought him in, they transferred him to GSVS for the intensive care he would require to be, essentially, brought back to life.  This was not an easy process and has been ongoing over a number of months.  GSVS actually has someone who can and would adopt him, someone who works there and has participated in his care.  AHS says, no, this can't happen.  They would like Patrick to be a part of their Zoo.

Let me repeat that, just in case you thought you weren't seeing this correctly.  THEY WOULD LIKE PATRICK TO BE A PART OF THEIR ZOO!

Hmmmmm...let's see.  Adoptive home on one side where this little man can stay the rest of his life living under relatively normal circumstances, or a Zoo.

I'm writing this blog to prove that some animal rescue people are certifiably nuts.  I've met some first hand in my own rescue experiences, which is not limited to dog rescue, but also horse rescue.  I think I've actually found more very nutty people on the horse rescue side, but this particular case may shift me into a different gear on that thought.

Who could POSSIBLY want this dog to not have a normal life with what has proven to be a very qualified home in terms of his adoption?  Who?  Why would AHS continue to spend so much money in the court system when it has animals in need and continues to fundraise for them?  Helllllllooooooooooooo....is anyone in there?

I have, admittedly, not been a part of every nuance of this case.  I don't know every tiny detail.  But as a human being, aren't animal advocates supposed to look out for the welfare of the animals?  Wouldn't part of that welfare mean that a dog who has been abused and offered a good home, be allowed to live out his life in that home?  Am I missing something?  I don't even have to know everything about this case to know that I would choose the home over the Zoo.

But then again, maybe it's not just about the dog, or his welfare.  Maybe it's about something that is green with numbers on it.  I just hope not.  I hope not.  I really hope not.

It's too bad humans have egos.  We need to learn from our animals.

Aaaarrrrooooooo!

If you would like to follow The Patrick Miracle, please go to this link on Facebook. You will find updated photos and videos here.

Tuesday, June 21, 2011

There is No Fire Here....I'm Just Cooking Something

The members of my family will be the first to tell you that I haven't spent alot of time in the kitchen in my recent past as a full-time employee.  It's not that I don't LIKE to cook, it's just that I've had a horrendous schedule and getting in the house at 8:00 at night doesn't lend itself to much besides a bowl of cereal or twizzlers and Nilla wafers.

Now that I'm retired, and into organic gardening, raising chickens and healthy food, I've made time to come back into my element when it comes to cooking up a good meal.


Dried pasta
 I come from a long line of very very good cooks.  My grandmother bought only staples at the store.  She made everything from scratch, including pasta.  I can remember Saturday nights where all the kitchen chairs in her house would be draped with cheese cloth over which she had noodles hanging to dry for Sunday's pasta feast.  Every Sunday, ALL of the members of the very large family we had at the time, would be REQUIRED to appear for pasta.  It didn't matter when they came in terms of time of day, but they had to come.  And, whatever the pasta du jour, it was served pleasantly by my grandmother and grandfather--who was responsible for the sauce--in heaping bowls with large meatballs as an accompaniment.

As kids we often helped make the pasta.  I don't really know how much we helped, but let's just say we did.  We'd get our own little rolls of dough and a dull cutting knife and we'd be able to cut our own pasta designs.  They would ultimately become part of the precisely cut noodles hanging to dry.

Years later, my grandmother would give me, written in her own handwriting, her recipes for various dishes, including meat pie, homemade pasta and other Polish and Italian delicacies.  The problem was that I was never sure what a "handful of flour" was as a measurement, or what "stir until you think it looks good" meant.  I still have most of the recipes stored away in my recipe holder in my kitchen.


Vanilla Bean ice cream with fresh picked cherry sauce.
 This past Sunday was Father's Day and we had a little get together at our house with our kids and their kids, and it reminded me so much of the required pasta Sunday's.  It also reminded me that I CAN INDEED cook, as everyone went away happy.  My menu was simple:  steaks on the grill, accompanied by quinoa-wildrice-fresh tomato salad, dilled redskinned potato salad, buttered corn on-the-cob with paprika, salt and pepper seasoning, and a very easy broccoli-mushroom-green onion and cheddar quiche (made with our farm fresh eggs from our lovely hens--thank you ladies!).  For dessert we had vanilla bean ice cream with a cherry sauce that I made by picking the cherries from our own tree (which is ABUNDANT this year).


Broccoli, mushroom, onion and cheddar quiche.
 I always know when I've hit a home run when our one son, who is an award-winning Chef says things like:  "this is really good,"  "I would have never thought to put these together," and "can I have the recipe for this."

But it wasn't always so.  There were very dark dark cooking years, where I had no idea how long or even how to cook a piece of meat.  One time I tried to make liver and onions.  I think you could have used that piece of liver as a frisbee and it would have outlasted any made on the market today.

There were plenty of burned pot bottoms long before "teflon" was an ingredient in pots, but I had been known to even burn through teflon.  I felt like a failure.  I shied away from making food or contributing food to various occasions.  I'd cop out and buy store bought instead, or pay someone to make it for me.  Then I realized a few things.  I had forgotten my heritage and all the fine foods I had tasted growing up as a child.  My Italian, Polish and German background brought with it an array of possibilities when it came to spicing and cooking up a good meal.  I had just been trying too hard and not allowing myself to channel my grandmother and grandfather.

So I threw all the measuring materials aside and began to cook based on sight, feel and taste (which is basically what my grandmother's recipes were telling me to do).  AND, I bought and looked for only fresh ingredients.  My grandparents raised their own chickens and ducks.  They had a grape arbor, and their own vegetable garden.  My grandfather caught all of our fish in a stream.  He hunted rabbits, squirrel and deer, as well as doves, and incorporated them into dishes long before it became fashionable or cost an arm and a leg in a fine dining establishment.  If I wanted to repeat the process, I needed to go back to the roots of cooking...finding good, basic ingredients. 

The key:  buy items that themselves are only ONE ingredient, which means, of course, NO PROCESSED FOODS.  A potato is a potato.  A piece of sockeye salmon is a piece of sockeye salmon.  Rice-A-Roni has umpteen ingredients on the side of the box, one of which just happens to be RICE.  ONE INGREDIENT.  Then add what I needed that was also fresh to make it taste good.


A Chef Rudy creation: blueberry pork chops with
rice and braised vegetables.
 My son caught the calling long before I ever noticed.  I guess I never really asked why our television was always on the FOOD channel.  He was drawn to the food industry like a moth to a light bulb, learning all he could (while still in high school and his early years trying out college) from top chefs, some of which graduated from Le Cordon Bleu and the Culinary Institute of America.  He worked his way up in one kitchen, then another, from kitchen helper to sous chef to executive chef.  It's from him that I have learned the art of "sauces, simple and spice."
  1. A good sauce can make the dish, but use it only if it fits.
  2. Keep the idea simple and neat in both creation and presentation.
  3. 
    Chef Rudy's maple mashed potatoes.
    
  4. Use the proper spices well to bring out the full flavor.
It's a long way from family calling the fire department because there is smoke coming out of the microwave!

We now buy our pork from a local farmer.  When he butchers the pigs, we buy 1/4 which lasts us quite a long time.  It lends itself to some of the best tasting bacon you will ever eat.  We grow our own "salad" garden in the summers, and I try to buy up root vegetables just before the fall to store for use later on.  I was so into beets last year that my son actually asked if I would please stop making everything with beets.  Sometimes I get carried away.  But I found a good deal on them at the end of the season from another local farmer, and, well, I LOVE BEETS!

Because no one should ever write about food without leaving readers with a recipe, here's my version of the easy quiche I've been talking about, along with a photo of how I like to serve it...very simply with sliced tomatoes on a bed of your favorite leaf lettuce.

Easy Broccoli Quiche (I add green onions, mushrooms and cheddar cheese, but you can add anything you like.  Sometimes I put in some cooked and crumbled bacon.)

1 bunch fresh broccoli (cut heads only into small pieces)
sliced mushrooms (as many as you like...I use 1/2 of the mushroom container)
green onions (scallions)...I cut up about 3 and include all of the green stalk
2 Tbsp unsalted butter
salt/pepper

Saute above ingredients in saucepan until broccoli turns bright green and begins to soften.  Add a pinch of salt and a sprinkle of pepper or to taste.  Set aside.

4 eggs
1 and 1/2 cups milk (use whole or 2%, nothing less)
pinch of salt, sprinkle of pepper
1 Tbsp unsalted butter melted

Beat together above ingredients with a wire whisk until well blended.

Use one 9" pie dish.  I like to use a china dish that is heat resistant.  I feel the consistency is better and the crust comes out evenly baked, as opposed to burning on a metal pie pan.

I use Pillsbury roll out pie dough.  It's easy and saves time.

Carefully place one Pillsbury roll out pie dough into china pie dish, pressing bottom into dish and sides along edge of dish.  Spoon the broccoli mixture from your saucepan directly into the pie dough base, being sure to evenly disburse the ingredients.  Use your favorite cheese, either shredding it or buying it already shredded.  I like a rich cheddar.  If I'm in a hurry I will buy it shredded, but normally I will buy it and shred it ahead of time and keep it in a ziploc bag in the fridge.  Sprinkle two hand fulls of cheese over the broccoli mixture you just placed in the pie shell.  Now pour the egg mixture carefully over everything.

Place in a preheated 350 degree oven for 30 minutes.  Let stand for at least 10 minutes once removed from oven and before slicing.  I actually like to serve my quiche at room temperature.  It absorbs all the flavors and tastes much better to me than it does steaming hot.

Enjoy!

Aarrooooooo!

Monday, June 13, 2011

No Pledge Required In Chicken Dusting

As I noted in my last blog, we are about a year into owning chickens, and we are learning as we go from a mentor who raises free-range chickens.  I belong to a few chicken keeping forums and I learn alot from them as well.  It was in one of these forums that a discussion ensued about "dusting" chickens.

Dusting chickens? Does that require a cloth?


A chicken giving itself a dust bath.
 In fact, chickens dust themselves often as part of their daily ritual.  Our chickens find a great spot in our barn that has loads of sawdust on the floor (leaving gaping "a-chicken-has-been-here" holes we later have to refill with our shovel), or they will just climb into our sawdust pile, and throw dust on themselves.  Dusting provides many benefits.  Mostly, it smothers parasites.  So in a way, chickens are cleaning themselves. 

However, it is important to make sure chickens are parasite free.  They do get chicken lice (which are different from the regular lice you and I know) and mites (those little red spidery things).  In order to do this you have to pick up a chicken and examine it by pulling back some feathers in various spots.

Diatomaceous Earth is a natural and non-toxic way of getting rid of almost any parasite predators.  DE is something I already use in my garden to dust my plants (as I do not want to use any pesticides on my fruits or vegetables) and the FOOD GRADE (this is important...there is a commercial grade and a food grade...you want the food grade) version can be used as a horse dewormer feed-through, and, now, for chicken dusting as well.  I also use DE in the coop by dusting the sawdust there and along the floor boards and edges where bugs can hide.  DE breaks down the outside shell of insects and ultimately kills them.  No insect is exempt.  This is why DE can be a real help to organic garden growth.


So easy a child can do it!
 We don't normally pick up our chickens.  My grandson was visiting last summer and he  had obtained loads of experience in chicken pick up by helping his Dad, who at the time worked for The Lands at Hillside, a non-profit reconstruction of a natural farm habitat in Dallas, PA.  So Andrew simply went up to one of our hens, grabbed it and held it and then asked "Do you guys pick up your chickens?"  We stood there aghast because it was so easy that even a 10 year old could do it and we really hadn't been lifting them.  We told ourselves we were establishing a "trust" relationship with our chickens, one where they could be assured that when we approached they had nothing to be afraid of.  Hmmmmm.....

To be honest, it is apparent we have been negligent in teaching our chickens to be held.  That was never so apparent as the night I decided to dust them.

First I watched this video on YouTube.  It is a great video.  I hope you will watch it.  You will see how CALM the hen is that is being dusted.  You will see towards the end the rooster is somewhat agitated by the fact that his hen is being bothered, but is simply cluck clucking around and walking back and forth.  These are all very important to note.  I also noted the hen's flaying leg get caught in the woman's shirt at one point and I chastised her silently for not keeping a good hold, thinking all the while that I would not have let that happen.

Then I watched this video.  In this version the British gentleman holds his chickens upside down by their feet to dust them.  I love the name "How To Powder A Chicken" and how he quite calmly in his british accent says "sometimes they struggle."  It's like "ho hum...are there scones with that tea?"  Same tone of voice.

I just want to note here that it is amazing how many videos of chicken legs being covered in bread crumbs and herbs you will find when you query "dusting chickens."  Hellllllooooooo!  Some of us are raising them for eggs ya' know!

Okay, so two videos under my belt, I felt, how hard could this be?

I'm about to tell you.

First, I wisely put on a light flannel shirt that was sitting on top of our dryer since January.  It is Paul's.  Although it was a relatively warm day, I was doing this in the early evening, and I wanted to be protected.  This was probably the wisest thing I did.

When  you read the DE labels it talks about things like not inhaling the dust, not getting the dust in your eyes.  I've always been careful when handling it even though it is non-toxic.  But, as you have seen in viewing the videos, the folks featured took no precautions against handling or breathing in the dust.  And, since the chickens ultimately would be, in my mind, as calm as they were in that video, I would be able to just dig in with my hands and rub that dust on them without incident.  They say God protects fools and drunks.  This is probably very true.

Out to the barn, where I get my "operation" set up. DE readily at hand, I go for my first chicken.  This is Jenny.  Jenny has had an injured wing since our neighbor's dog took it upon herself to come up and chase our chickens.  She was an easy catch and really didn't put up much of a struggle.  I held her wings and held her close to me just as you saw in the video.  I rubbed the DE over her.  We have her separated in a dog crate right now so that the other chickens do not pick on her until her wing fully heals, so back in the crate she went and I felt encouraged by how easy that was.


A chicken running at full tilt!
 Then I had to dust Screech, our rooster, and Henny, our other hen.  They had been walking about the barn, so Paul helped me "corral" them.  First Henny was captured in our feed room where she desperately tried to hide behind every container we own.  Chickens can really move out when they want to.  They are fast little buggers.  When I finally grabbed her, you would think we were cutting off limbs one at a time.  She made the most ungodly racket!  Screech was so perturbed by the fact that I was causing HIS hen so much anguish by simply picking her up, he began to squawk loudly and continuously, and flap his wings.  Henny decided this was a good opportunity to peck me.  I was undaunted.  I moved with her toward the DE bag and felt a great deal of satisfaction rubbing that dust all over her while she continued her loud and obnoxious chicken oratory.  When she was done and I put her down, she pecked me again just for good measure and ran off toward Screech. 

We corraled Screech behind a large piece of plywood we used as a barrier to keep him in a corner.  If I thought Henny was loud, Screech was even louder.  One thing they needed to tell you in these videos was to buy and wear a set of ear plugs.  If I ever make a video on dusting chickens, you can bet that will be in there.  "If you don't handle your chickens often, you may want to purchase and wear a set of ear plugs.  Sometimes they struggle.  Sometimes they scream bloody murder.  Are there any scones with that tea?"  I'll try to be just as calm and unsuspecting in my video as the folks were in the videos I watched.  I won't say things like:  "You will have to CHASE DOWN your chickens running at full tilt, corner them with whatever you find, and be prepared to be pecked.  You will have to put up with 90 DECIBEL squawking."

Screech, the WIMP, protested through the entire session, which only lasted about a minute.  Finally he was done too.  He and Henny IMMEDIATELY went to the safety of their coop to get away from me.  WHAT WAS THIS TRAVESTY THAT JUST OCCURRED!  HOW DARE WE PICK THEM UP!

Finally, I had to dust the two new hens, who live in one of our stalls for the time being.  I closed myself in with them and then proceeded, somewhat Larry, Moe and Curly style, to capture first one, and then the other.  Neither one of them pecked me, to which I was astounded because they really don't know me as well, and, in fact, the second hen, once caught, was pretty calm about the dusting process.  I'll bet she's been handled by our chicken mentor!


I'm sure this conversation went on in our coop after
we left for the night!
 Unfortunately (or fortunately for me) we had no camera.  Once completed, I took stock in my appearance.  I was covered in white dust from top to bottom.  I was pretty sure I ate some.  In fact, if I stayed this way, no insects would land on me for 3-6 months.  I was completely covered in sweat thanks to the flannel shirt and the chicken dashing.  Oh yeah, sign me up to make that video.  Maybe we can even send it to Ellen.  We can title it:  WHAT NOT TO DO WHEN "POWDERING" CHICKENS.

All I know is this.  Our chickens are going to be picked up regularly from now on.  They don't need to be dusted for 3-6 months, but you can bet the next time will be smoother.

I went out the next day and they all ran away from me.  So much for months of trust.  Get ready ladies and Screech.  Your chicken world is changing.

Aaaarrrrrooooo!

Sunday, June 12, 2011

And Then What...?

I had no plans of posting an addendum to my chicken story, but Wednesday's addition to the chicken family is a tale worth telling.

Our chicken mentor has a number of young hens that needed to be culled from the flock.  She just has quite a number of free range chickens, and looks to place what she cannot use in homes that will enjoy them and their eggs.  I requested two hens when the first batch of new babies came in.  She selected two sister hens for me to pick up tonight at 7:00 p.m., when her flock goes to roost and are generally easier to find and catch.


Barred Rock Bantam
 I was told to bring a large cat carrier, which I did.  The hens were indeed inside their building, and perching by 7:00 p.m.  Suddenly I see her appearing at the door with a container full of eggs and a hen sitting on top of them.  This, apparently, is hen sister number one, a Barred Rock Bantam.  (This is the same type of hen as our lovely Penny, whom we lost last year.)

I guess my face must have registered my surprise, because she began to explain to me that the hen has been sitting on a clutch of eggs, and she hates to part her from them, so she would appreciate it if I would take the container and allow the hen to keep sitting on them.  If they hatch, I can choose to keep what I get or bring them back if I do not want to raise the baby chicks.  Huh?  I think she lost me at "take the container with the eggs."  So I ask:  "Uh, will she just stay sitting on these in my car?" (This is why I have a mentor...to ask silly questions like this one!)  The answer is no, which is why she produces a large ventilated feed bag to put over the hen and the container so the hen would remain in the container in my car.  (My mind is asking the question....And then what?)

Hey, I'm no chicken wrangler, so I will just take whomever's word for it that chickens will be cooperative.  So we place the hen and container in the bag and I carry it to my car.  As I said, it's ventilated with some hole openings, and the hen sticks her beak through and squawks at me.  The next thing I know, this chicken is proving her long lineage back to the cat (have you ever put a cat in a box and closed it leaving a little hole?), as she sticks her entire head through the opening, then somehow, before my eyes, like a magic trick gone haywire, pushes the rest of herself OUT OF THAT HOLE and flys out of my car.  The eggs look lonely in the ventilated bag and the chicken is now running around and squawking, causing all the other roosters who have not yet roosted to come out and take a peek at what is going on and if I am attack worthy.  (Again, my mind is screaming...And Then What?)

I walk back to where my mentor is standing and point to the chicken, noting that it's too bad she isn't a HE because we would name him Houdini.  In the meantime, she has captured the Barred Rock Bantam hen number two and has placed her in my cat carrier.  My theory is, both need to go into the cat carrier, and I'll just take the eggs with me and place hen number one on them again when I get home.  This is agreed upon and soon both hens and eggs are secured in the cargo area of my Explorer and we are headed home. Now I have to explain the egg situation to Paul.  (Once again...And Then What?)

At home we have a nice spot for them to acclimate.  We were originally going to use a dog crate, but then thought why not just use our big extra stall until all chickens become buddies and then we can revert the stall back to hay storage.  So we set it up with the original wooden ladder perch our first batch of chickens used, some hay bales, a waterer, a feeder and a white bowl of freshly cut green grape treats.


I think this photo best captures Paul's
exasperation at seeing 16 chicken eggs.
 Upon arriving home I had to explain the whole egg clutch thing to Paul.  After the initial shock wore off his face, his response was:  "PEEPS!!!  WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO WITH PEEPS!!!!??????"  I explained that if we didn't want to keep the baby chicks we could take them back and that our great-and-wonderous-Oz chicken mentor wasn't even sure that they would all hatch.  So, I put the chickens into the stall, unloading them from the cat carrier, and they begin to explore.  I also placed the potential baby chick eggs in a safe place on a few hay bales, where the hen would feel she was perching and would continue to sit on them.  (And Then What?...)

In the meantime, Screech, our rooster whom we've segregated into the other chicken area, is going ballistic.  He is squawking and carrying on, prancing and flapping his wings.  It is now almost 8:00 p.m., so I shut his coop light off.....GOODNIGHT SCREECH and PLEASE SHUT UP!  So he settles down and becomes quiet and moves up his perch.

We decide to name the newbies Rebecca (Becky) and Sarah (two biblical names because they are doing alot of begatting with those 16 eggs).  Becky is the rounder, fatter sister, and Sarah is the taller, skinnier one.  As Becky and Sarah are settling in, Becky flies to the top of the stall (There is an air gap of about 1.5 feet between the top of our stalls and the barn ceiling.)  Uh oh...if she wants to, she can fly down and out.  (And Then What?...)

We never expected that.  We also suddenly realize that the spacing between our stall bars may be wide enough for her to fly out.  Just as we are realizing this fact, sure enough she tries to fly out of one.  Paul rolls his eyes because he knows that here we are at 8:15 p.m. with a chicken project.  It is one of those hot days and so it is still approximately 85 degrees out.  He is already sweating just thinking about it.  (And Then What?...)

Our foster dog, Danny, checking out the mud
barrier frames.

So Paul brings out some of the materials we used to create a mud barrier for our dogs in our fenced yard when the mighty rains fell a few weeks ago.  He had built frames to use to protect our garden, has since built better frames, and so these were available.  These frames kept our dogs' feet cleaner by keeping them out of the muddiest area of our yard, but we took them down once the major monsoons ended.  These materials came in handy, as did some extra livestock fencing we had.  We stretched the livestock wire over the bars of the stall and nailed it in place so that the hens cannot fly out, and then used the framed portions to block their access over the tops of the stall.  Fort-Chicken-Knox.

In the meantime, Screech went ballistic again when Becky tried to make an escape for the second time and instead flew into the newly installed livestock fencing.  You would think the chicken hawks were attacking.  I'm sure he got no sleep that night listening to the invaders in the next stall over to the coop.  Viking chickens were pillaging his village after all. 

By this time I feel like I've been attacked by 1000 mosquitos, and Paul is sweating up a storm.  And there is always the threat that if one spider rears it's ugly head, I'm outta there.


Hen sitting on egg.
 Finally we are done.  We head in the house for a brief period of rest and air conditioned comfort. We later checked on the newbies and they seemed happy.  Becky was sitting on her eggs, while Sarah was inhabiting a hay bale.  Screech is listening intently to every barn sound as Henny and Jenny turn in with him for the night.

I don't know "nothin' 'bout birthin' no" baby chicks, so stay tuned for future updates here in chickendom!  And tomorrow I promise you the best story ever about "chicken dusting" which I did last night! There are alot of "and then what's" still to come as we perhaps experience the "joy of peeps!"

Aaarrrroooooooo!

Tuesday, June 7, 2011

Chickens Are Really Odd Ducks!


Front to back:  Penny, Henny, Screech
 We have chickens.  Not alot of chickens.  Right now we have three chickens.  We had four, three hens and a rooster, but we lost a hen at the age of almost two.  It seems that two is a critical age for hens, and that in the chicken world, finding a two year old hen that hasn't made it through the night is not an oddity.  It's an oddity to me, because I take pretty seriously owning any living creature, and so I searched chicken forums for days to find out why we lost this wonderful hen, named Penny.  None of the health reasons applied, so finally it boiled down to the fact that some chickens just die.

Our remaining chickens are named Henny, Jenny and Screech.  Screech is our rooster.  His name is fitting.  Henny is a Rhode Island Red and Jenny is an Araucana.  Screech is a Delaware rooster.  All of our chickens are very friendly.  I have trained them to recognize a white ceramic bowl as "we come bearing gifts" and they run to greet me with pure enthusiasm when I'm carrying the magic bowl.  The bowl carries things like chopped up grapes, cooked corn, cut up spaghetti (they love the noodles), chopped up lettuce, and other favorite goodies.  I also buy them bags of unsalted roasted sunflower seeds, which is their ultimate favorite treat on record.  They are very easy to keep.  They require a commercial chicken feed, which we supplement with cracked corn and oyster shells.  The oyster shell additive is a calcium boost and helps the shells of their eggs become stronger.

Before the chickens, there was the GREAT CHICKEN DEBATE.  The debate starred Elaine (pro chicken) and Paul (anti chicken).  As debates go in the Tweedy household, this one lasted a long time.  Much longer than the SHOULD WE GET A SECOND HORSE debate (we have five) and the THREE DOGS ARE TOO MANY debate (as you recall, we have eight at the moment).  Yes, in the annuls of Tweedy debatedom, the GREAT CHICKEN DEBATE may go down in history as the longest running debate, lasting several years.

Pro chicken Elaine would say things like "I want to get some chickens" to which anti chicken Paul would say "over my dead body."  That was all of year one.

Year two started with pro chicken Elaine using research and proof to back up her statements.   "Did you know that chickens eat 12,000,000,000,000 bugs a year?  Imagine how clean they could keep our barn!"  To which anti chicken Paul would reply "over my dead body."  (Anti chicken Paul was not very inventive in Year 2.)  The second half of Year 2 had pro chicken Elaine stating things like how free-range chickens produced great tasting eggs, and how more and more processed foods and larger factory farms were producing eggs that weren't really "organic."  Anti chicken Paul would say "uh huh, that's nice."  (It was a refreshing change from "over my dead body.")


On their original wood ladder perch.
 In Year 3, Elaine simply came home with three chickens, pulled into the driveway, got them out of the car and said "we have three chickens."  Paul spent about four hours that day rebuilding our extra hay room into a chicken dwelling (and probably saying bad things under his breath), while Elaine ran out to Agway for feed, feed containers, waterers, etc.  After the first week of eggs, Paul finally realized how easy they were to keep and how good their end product really was, and we were now in the chicken business.  We added one more hen (Jenny) to the mix at that point.

We have a mentor, who has raised and continues to raise, plenty of free range chickens, and we learned as we went along.  For instance, a good economical brooder is a milk carton nailed to a plywood base, with hay as bedding in the carton.  We originally used a wooden ladder as their perch, but Paul has since built a great wooden staircase-type ladder with wider planks for them to climb up at night.  Our "coop" area is screened in the summer and one half the door is planked in the winter so they do not get a ground draft.  We have heat lamps for the winter as well, and a plug in chicken waterer which keeps the water from icing up and at drinkable room temp.  They get a fan in the summer.


Our horses hiding from the chickens.
 Our chickens wander around our property when we are here, and when we are not, we put them back into their coop so we don't have to worry about any predators finding them.  As dusk begins to fall, they gravitate toward the coop on their own and climb up onto their perch where they sleep all night.  We lock the coop for the overnight hours.

My grandmother was the instigator of the "odd duck" syndrome.  If she didn't like what you had to say or you didn't agree with her, you were an "odd duck."  Out of the blue she would say something like, "That Josephine Armatto, she left her clothes hanging out all night and they were rained on....what an odd duck she is."  My grandmother would NEVER leave clothes on the line in the rain, or for that matter overnight, and her standards for clothes hanging were so high, most of us were afraid to even hang a sock for fear we would put the clothespin in the wrong spot!


Are you in there?  Do you have food?
Our chickens at the front door.
 So it's with this same "odd duck" ferver I am here to tell you that chickens very much march to their own drummers.  They aren't like other household pets that you have.  You really don't "pet" chickens, and they don't come when you call their names, although, Screech does seem to know his, because when I say it he turns his head sideways and walks toward me a bit.  They are smart.  They learn from doing, and they learn quickly.  For instance, just one time, I walked out the front door of our house to see the chickens in the driveway, went back inside and got a bag of roasted sunflower seeds and threw some on the front walk for them.  Every single day after that, they would march up the front walk and peer in the side window of our front door to see if I was coming with more sunflower seeds.

They also have a large self-preservation sixth sense, which tells them where and where not to go and what they should be afraid of.  They are not afraid of our cats, and our cats have never tried to bother them, although our Harry is very curious about them and will lay around them for long periods of time watching them.  They know that our dogs remain in the perimeter of our yard, and though they will walk very close to the fence line, they have NEVER come into our yard, unless they were being pursued by some unseen preditor (once we found Penny in our yard, and more recently Henny in our yard--and both times we feel they were being pursued by our neighbor's dog).  Our dog Winston has actually been in the barn with them and he just blinks at them.  He has never tried to go after them.  I do believe our dogs Burton and Bethy would definitely be interested in using them as rag toys.  Piper would only want to herd them somewhere.  Ike has also never bothered the chickens.

Roosters really don't just cock-a-doodle-doo to greet the sunsrise.  Oh no, they crow when they are missing the hens, when they want to puff out their chests, when they expect something, when they are out and about and want to make sure you know it, when Pluto and Mars are out of alignment....dang it, they crow an awful lot.  Hens also make ALOT of racket when they are laying.  The very first time our hens were laying, I heard so much screeching coming out of the coop, I ran, barefoot, to the barn thinking a fox or coyote had gotten in the barn.  In fact, they were announcing the birth of an egg.
We are about to add two more hens to our fold.  They are coming on Wednesday (tomorrow).  Chickens are not very friendly to each other.  My mother told me my grandfather used to sneak the new chickens into the brooder at night, when the others are on perch.  Well, we tried that when we snuck in Jenny as a new chicken last year.  Nope, didn't work.  All the others came down and examined her, then tried to peck her to death in their "odd duck" chicken fashion of saying "hello...we do not welcome you to this farm."  So we had to intervene and separate them for a while.  This time, we are ready.  We are putting the new girls in a dog crate so that the others can walk around them and get used to them without attacking them.  This may minimize the punishment they would originally receive until they find their place on the chicken totem pole.


Eggs from our chickens!
 At any rate, you cannot beat collecting your own eggs every morning, or how fresh and good they are when made in traditional ways, or added to baking or other dishes.  No matter how odd chickens seem to be, they are alot of fun.  Even Paul agrees.

Aarrooooooo!

Friday, June 3, 2011

Splash My Face With Cold Water: What Was I Thinking?

I promised myself I wouldn't complain too much on blog postings, but something really has my dander up.


Ablutia blah blah blah...
 For the past few years, I have been using a facewash product by Lancome, the name of which I cannot spell or pronounce, but suffice it to say one of it's titled names is Ablutia.  When I go to the store to buy this, I ask for it this way:  "Uh, yeah, can I have a bottle of that pink foamy gel cleanser by Lancome?"  (I know...I know...so cosmopolitan of me, right?)  After a brief search, the counter salespeople usually find the only pink thing made by Lancome and say "do you mean blah blah blah blah blah?"  to which I nod my head and smile.  Yes, of course I do, but I can't pronounce those silly names that some companies give their products.  I just know it when I see it, and it's pink.

So about a week ago, after waiting much too long (until I actually had to add some water to the product to "extend" it) to go buy another bottle, I discovered the product was nowhere to be found in any of the regular department stores where it used to be found.  The reason?  Lancome decided to discontinue it.  They WHAT?

Mind you, this is a very good product that they usually cannot keep on the shelf.  Many times I've gone to find it sold out, and had to wait for a new shipment.  So what marketing genious at the helm of this company decided that it should be discontinued?  The very nice, well dressed and always cutely made up salesperson showed me a NEW product that would take the place of Ablutia blah blah blah.  I am not a trusting soul of new products, especially when I'm thrown into them, blindsided by discontinuation of my much loved products.  I figured I'd be able to find at least ONE MORE bottle of this face cleanser SOMEWHERE...

To no avail, I drove to several stores, only to find the same answer waiting for me:  "I'm sorry, we no longer carry that product."  You can always find anything you want on Ebay, right?  So that same night I did an Ebay search and found five bottles at TWICE THE PRICE I USED TO PAY FOR IT!  Seems some Ebay sellers got the memo from Lancome that this product would be discontinued and there would be some users out there who would be verrrrryyyy interested in getting their hands on a few bottles of the stuff.  Hence the 150% markup.  (Sigh...)

During my search for the now vanished product, I came across a website and posting regarding animal testing.  I've included the link here.  To my shock and horror, I realized that I was using a facial product from a company that does animal testing and suddenly I didn't feel so bad about it going off the market.


This is me.  Well not really, but
it could be.
 Depending on where you research, L'Oreal (the company behind Lancome--pronounced Lan - comb) does or does not do animal testing.  Hmmmm.  What's up with that?  Can't decide?  Since I couldn't find definitive proof one way or the other, I decided that I was giving up on L'Oreal in favor of a new product.  In my retired years, I plan on standing behind my values 100% under the theory that I am older and crankier (and that will be my excuse).  So I can blatantly point out that your lip gloss has pieces of insects in it and was tested on rabbits.  Nice conversation starter.  Should keep people flocking to me when they see me.

Then I found an article about an entire contigent of people who must be as old and cranky as I am because they are banning all products and companies that use animal testing.  Yep, those cranky European Union folks are all about standing behind their values too.  You can read about it by clicking here.  This ban will go into effect in 2013.  You will also find another list of do-they-or-don't-they test on animals as a part of this article.

I happened to have tried a new company recently for shampoo.  It's called DHC.  They sent me some trial sized items, so I pulled out a packet appropriately titled "FACE WASH."  At least I can pronounce this.  Their shampoo is excellent and I probably will never buy another kind, especially now that I've done my homework on DHC and find that they use all natural products and no animal testing.  To see what else they have to offer, check out this link.

The entire saga got me to thinking that there are probably products in the world that SHOULD BE discontinued, but are still on the market.

Here's a great article by Brenda Nelson about 10 dangerous pet products.  Some other items that I think could just go away are any video games that have a player committing crimes.  If the game showcases carjacking, killing people and running from the police, I'd say a little bit of gasoline and a match could make it obsolete.  What ever happened to Pac Man?

Then there are spray on tans.  Think about it.  You spray them on.  You pay good money and they are SPRAYED on.  And you are somewhat orange for about three days, and need to get rid of whatever clothing you wore to the place that sprayed it on you.  There is nothing, in my book, that can replace healthy, small doses of sunshine.

Two words.  RICE. CAKES.............CARD. BOARD.  Enough said here I think.

And finally, can we all agree that FISH STICKS should just be banned from human consumption?  Sure, as a child, I ate fish sticks and tater tots like they were going out of style.  But my poor mother had to get something in me besides Puffed Rice, which is all I would eat for a few months.  As an adult, I understand that there are no stick fish in nature.  Not one.

Aaarrrrooooooo.

Wednesday, June 1, 2011

There's A Vampire in My Bed

Sometimes I will get my ideas for blogs from readers.  And so it goes that I took this idea from a new reader who made a comment on Facebook regarding vampires.

In my whole rehabilitative, mother role, I kind of like vampires.  I want to take them under my wing and make them normal.  "Hey you...no sleeping during the day now...get up and clean your room!"  That kind of normal.  "Eat-your-steak-and-drink-your-milk" normal.  "Brush those fangs for at least three minutes" normal.


Bela Lugosi as Dracula.
As a young child I loved scarey movies.  I especially loved the Bela Lugosi version of Dracula, and the Boris Karloff version of Frankenstein.  Since then vampires have evolved, just like fashion.  In the Lugosi version, Dracula hid out in a castle in some unknown small village called Transylvania.  There were cobblestone streets and mobs with torches.  There are always mobs with torches. 

Transylvania sounds alot like Pennsylvania, where I live, and our roads are just as bad as Transylvania's, so I figure vampires could be right at home here.  We don't have torch mobs, but we have Talk-Back-16 on WNEP-TV News, and that sure brings out the strangest callers, whom I'm sure if given the chance, would grab a torch immediately and run to the streets searching for vampires to menace.


Cruise and Pitt in the movie Interview
With The Vampire.
In the late 1980's I read the first three books of The Vampire Chronicles by Anne Rice.  I love to read.  Anne painted a lovely picture of vampires living together and interacting, instead of just hiding out in some castle that needed a real cleaning.  Then in 1994, everything was spoiled when the first book, Interview With the Vampire, came out as a movie starring Tom Cruise as Lestat, and Brad Pitt as his cohort, Louis.  I'm not a big Tom Cruise fan, nor am I a Brad Pitt fan, and while I thought the movie stayed true to the book and some of the cinematography was lovely, I would have cast neither of these men in their respective roles based on having read the books.  But nobody asked me.

Robert Pattinson plays the latest in
daylight vampires in the Twilight
movies.

Still, that 1994 version of Anne Rice's first book, stands far and above the latest vampire epic that's also hit the big screen:  Twilight.  I'm a baby boomer agewise.  These movies are not for me.  While I understand the books are better, I haven't been drawn to read them.  My mother likes the Twilight saga, and so I've taken her to see the first two in the theater, and we rented the third movie via Red Box.  Twilight = vampires meet high school.  Whining, fickle girls, fickle boys, jealousy, texting, and no one being able to make up their minds about anything...that about sums it up for these movies.  They have bad hair days, parents who get on their backs about stuff, and haven't quite mastered the use of make up to get some color in their faces.  The best concept that comes out of the Twilight movies are the fact that the vampires can now exist in the daylight.  See what I mean about evolution?


The common vampire bat.
While vampires, much like unicorns, don't seem to make their presence known much anymore, except in books or movies, there are indeed REAL vampires that exist in the world.  One such mammal is the vampire bat.  This mammal is unique because it is the only one that exists solely on blood.  Feeding on blood has a name.  It's called hematophagy.
There may be only one mammal which feeds on blood, but there are plenty of vampires in the insect world including mosquitos, ticks, fleas, biting flies, and the most-popular-lately bed bug.

Biting flies are a nusance to my horses.  No one has invented a natural fly spray yet that can evict the biting fly for good.  Crosses do not work to fend them off, and they don't stand still long enough to put tiny, wooden stakes through their hearts.

My dogs have the potential to be plagued by fleas and ticks.  So I spend a small fortune keeping them protected with Front Line Plus and bathing them in Tea Tree Oil shampoos.  I examine them every night for ticks, which are the most disgusting bugs on the planet next to spiders.

Mosquitos harbor diseases and breed on standing, stagnant water.  They are the third highest on my list of the top ten bugs I hate, coming in just after ticks and spiders.  So you see, there ARE real, living, breathing organisms that can be considered vampires.

Vampires are not to be confused with gothers.  Goth is a way of dressing which often includes very dark looks such as black nail polish and lipstick (for women mostly, although I have seen some male gothers with painted nails and even sometimes lipstick) and spiked, blue or white streaked hair (for men and women). I am a South Park fan (I love the sarcastic humor of South Park), and the best ever take off on vampires versus gothers is THIS EPISODE called The Ungroundable.  In it Butters mistakes some goth-like students for vampires and hilarity ensues.


My favorite vampire movie.
 Besides this rendition, my favorite vampire movie of all time is The Lost Boys.  Starring such stalwarts as Kiefer Sutherland, Jason Patric, and Corey Haim, it also stars Dianne Wiest as the goofy, clueless mother whose youngest son discovers evil lurks in the neighborhood in a "vampires among us" approach loaded with tongue-in-cheek humor and some really creepy scenes.

Back to bugs for just one second.  The latest news is that we are under seige by bed bugs.  Suddenly, and for no apparent reason, they have supposedly appeared in mass quantities everywhere you turn.  Late night infomercials would have us all buy "Bed Bug Out!", an ultrasonic plug in deal that emits a frequency only bed bugs can hear and forces them to leave the premises.  Uh huh.

Bed bugs are not new science folks.  When I was growing up, as a small child my grandmother would always say, "goodnight, sleep tight, don't let the bed bugs bite."  That was over 50 years ago.  I've never been bitten by a bed bug.  I have been bitten by a flea, however, which is why I wage war on them with my dogs in terms of cleanliness and prevention.  I just won't share my bed with vampires.

Aarrooooooooooo!